My name is Chiara and I am a Bookworm.
I didn’t do one of these last week, but that was because I was putting something off.
Last week was my first shifts back at work. I talked a few weeks ago about wearing a mask now that it is compulsory in closed in spaces in the UK.
And I had got used to wearing one while I was out shopping, which was for most an hour at a time and it was the masks that I had chosen. Masks I know how to make work for my face and that don’t rub around my eyes and sit far enough below my chin that I don’t feel like I have to adjust them all the time.
But my first shift in work I went in, they took my temperature with an infra-red thermometer and they handed me a mask and I went to get changed.
From the moment I put the mask on it made me feel like I was going to hyperventilate. I know I wasn’t. I know that it was all in my head but I could feel the panic rising up with in me.
As soon as I did I would do my breathing exercises but the all the adrenaline from the panic running in my system would just make me feel ill and then I had to concentrate on that and working through that. By the time I got through feeling sick I would realise I was starting to hyperventilate again.
It was like this never ending circle.
And I don’t know how to deal with it. I don’t know how to get myself out of this loop.
I need to be able to concentrate on my job and wearing a mask is now a necessary part of the job.
I’ve been asked a few times to come in and work an extra shift but I really need to take it slow and I’m not sure that work realise how slow I need to take this process and I’m not sure that they will give me the time to take it slow.
I know I’m waffling here and you may not even want to hear about my troubles but I felt the need to put it put there.
What else have I been doing these past few weeks?
I have been signing myself up for a lot of Blog Tours. Which I am going to have to start reading now in order that I don’t miss any of them. I didn’t keep proper track of all the dates that I’d signed up for and now I have three dates all with one day between each one. I am determined to be organised for them all.
In other news, this heatwave is killing me … slowly. I hope it doesn’t last much longer. Normally, I like hot weather, I love hot weather. But I don’t actually like doing anything in that hot weather and it was too hot to go and get the fan out of the loft. That place is like a sauna. How are you all coping with the weather? Is it any better than it is here?
And I believe this is where I will leave you.
I’m sorry for rambling about my work problems. I hope you forgive me.
And until next time, happy reading.